When compatriots or friends back home heard you’re now living in abroad, many generalize that you have a much better life, more opportunities and a common misconception that you’re “financially rich.”
Many don’t see your hard earned sacrifice, your much more frugal ways of living to match the higher standard cost of living in abroad and high taxation while others have the misconceptions of a sky fall foreign currency dole out for those who cannot live with their budget but found a grace of chance to milk money from compatriots living and working in abroad.
Helping out immediately during emergencies such as accident, grave illness and death, reaching out for those who are truly in need and in dire poverty come from a generous heart when you have the possibility to reach out.
These are some unwanted financial stress situations which should be dealt with honest, pragmatic consideration:
1. When friends put a proxy for you in a set of 12 or more godparents in a commercialized Baptism or wedding, leaving you no option to decline because you don’t want to hurt your friend/relative
2. When people pretend to have grave needs then pressure you as if you owe them something even if you don’t. They have false expectations that you will help them regularly even if they are not your responsibility
3. When solicitation comes from former schoolmates, town or provincial events
4. When they thought you as an imported breadwinner to a financially decaying but uncontrollable babies’ booming family
5. When high maintenance people continuously nag you by using social networks, e-mails, sms and overseas call because they know you are helpful
It hurts to be often seen like an automated imported teller machine where people only remember you when they need you, however there are common grounds where the demands of imported financial sky fall dole out can be minimised on both expats and needy receivers:
– Budget well by living below one’s monthly income and the value of saving
– Help yourself first, this is not selfishness but having the right priority being self-sufficient, resourceful, industrious, self-reliant stable survival
– Help to emancipate, support to provide economic opportunity but not to grow monetary parasitic dependence
– Avoid loans or installment goods
– Avoid bad vices, don’t be an accessory to the vices of others
– Avoid impulse buying: focus on necessity not wants
– Go for quality goods not brands nor quantity
– Be a wise consumer, don’t confuse shopping and entertainment
– Apply daily energy saving tips
– Be a wise buyer, refrain from showing off and even if you are not showing off, some people still misjudge even if you are simply rewarding yourself from your hard work
– Travel with frugal budget
– Be happy with your personal achievements. Excessive comparison to unaffordable life styles will only dig deeper unhappiness instead of fulfillment
– Appreciate the help of others but respect their untold life struggle, do-it-all-on-your-own in abroad self-sufficient life style and the priceless painful nostalgia of one’s native country.
– Don’t live life to impress others, this surely hacks your peace of mind and security.
Helping should not always be equated with money, it can be through spiritual and moral support of having a true, faithful, caring, empathizing friend/relative where you both accept and respect each other’s unique way of thriving in life.